top of page

How I Knew I Had A Drinking Problem

Everyone has a different story of how they started drinking. Mine didn't begin until I was about 20-21. I never had alcohol in the house. I've never seen anyone in my family drink. So, I wasn't introduced to alcohol until college.

I attended a small, Christian college, so interestingly enough, my friends and I didn't drink much. But, when we did, I was usually the one blacking out, or throwing up in the bathroom or bushes. My problematic drinking didn't start until I was about 25. I remember the summer it happened. My brother was a Marine stationed in San Diego, and I went to visit him for a Fourth of July weekend. It ironically happened to be the weekend, I met my now husband, Clayton. We spent the whole weekend on the beach, and in clubs intoxicated.

Clayton and I started dating pretty quickly, (he's pretty cool and good looking what can I say?!) I soon moved to Jacksonville, Florida where he was stationed as a rescue swimmer in the Navy.

It was Florida, it was warm and we were in our mid 20's we drank heavily about 4 to 5 days a week. Clayton and I got into many drunken fights, but it didn't seem abnormal because everyone else around me was doing it. I continued to drink like this into my late 20's into my 30's.

I honestly didn't start to realize I had a problem, until I found myself staying out until 2 am, and driving while intoxicated. I was throwing up more, blacking out, getting cut off at bars, and having Clayton pick me up. Despite all of this it took me a few years to get sober.

Now that I share my story of recovery so openly, I often get asked the question, "how do I know if I have a problem?" There's really no easy answer to that question. I remember googling that question over and over.

I think the better question to ask yourself, is: "Is alcohol getting in the way of me living my best life?" "Is alcohol impacting my ability to authentically show up for the people in my life" I know that when I was drinking it was impossible for me to do this. In fact, I remember completely missing Clayton's 30th birthday, because I was at the bar drinking the night away.

When I quieted my mind and was completely honest with myself I knew I needed help. The final straw was me showing up to work drunk, and going on a two day binge.

I hope this helps you do the deep work of understanding your relationship to alcohol better, and just know that if you want to stop, it's always possible.

131 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All


bottom of page